This sure has been a big week and I am feeling a little overwhelmed because of it!
It all started on Monday [as the week usually does] with the beginning of the countdown to my surgery and the start of my new very strict pre-op diet. Despite having done it before, it has been so extremely difficult! I am CONSTANTLY hungry, to the point of having pains in my stomach, I am very vague, and feel quite light-headed and oh the tiredness! I feel like my body just has nothing to be using as fuel. How people do this long-term is beyond me!
Tuesday I kind of freaked myself out by reading about life without a Gall Bladder [get the back story here] on the internet – not a good idea. I was convinced I was going to end up in another horrible situation where I couldn’t eat normal foods, right when I am on the cusp of being able to eat normally again!
Then Wednesday came along and I had to have a CT scan to determine whether or not my Gall Bladder is the cause of the painful episodes I have had recently. I had no idea the process of a having a CT took so long. I had to drink contract fluid, which was rather disgusting at various time intervals before the test, plus they were injecting me with something while the test was happening too. Anyway the test was done and I had to wait til the afternoon to get the results. I picked them up and then headed straight to my GP who explained it all to me. Liver – fine, lungs – fine, kidneys – fine, stomach – ok, bowel – fine. Then he said they weren’t really able to get a very good image of my gall bladder with the CT either [get the back story here] but they could see that there were not gall stones – which is good news, but there was a lot of sludge [sand like consistency] which shows that gall bladder has been irritated for a while. The GP said that my gall bladder will need to be removed at some point and that it wasn’t urgent, but to try and speak to the surgeon about it while I was in Canberra the next day and he might remove it at the same time as my other surgery.
Wednesday evening I went to visit my not-yet-three-year-old niece in hospital. She had had her tonsils and adenoids taken out and grommets put in her ears that morning. Poor little sweet heart was so grogged up when I got there. She livened up quite a bit when I got there though. She loves her Aunty Manda, and Aunty Manda is rather crazy about her! We had wonderful snuggles – which was extra special as she is not usually a sunggly child. I was great to see her doing so well – but it was not a good idea to visit right at hospital dinner time. The smells of everyone’s food was driving my stomach juices crazy making me even more hungry! Eventually I came home and just zoned out watching all the fab renovating and cooking shows on TV.
Mum and I were up early on Thursday in the freezing cold ready to head to Canberra for my Pre-Op appointment at the hospital. It’s only a 3 hour trip from where I live. It was really cold in the car, but a lovely drive. Mum and I have done it a few times lately and we both quite enjoy it. We get into a good conversation, put some great music on and then we are there before we know it! We found the hospital and I met with a couple of nurses who took my medial history, did a few tests and took me through what to expect when I returned for the operation. As part of the medical history I explained to the nurse about the whole gall bladder situation and told her I had tried to get an appointment to see the Surgeon while I was in Canberra that day, but was unable to. She made a quick phone call and arranged for me to see him once I had finished at the Hospital – Thank God! I also saw the anesthetist who asked a bunch of questions and gave me info too.
Once I was finished at the hospital we headed across the car park to the Surgeon’s clinic and only had to wait a short amount of time before I was called in. After looking at all my scans and test results the Surgeon wasn’t convinced that it was my gall bladder causing the issues. I didn’t know this previously, but part of what he does is deal with gall bladders, he removes them all the time and knows what to look for. He said the location of my pain and the symptoms I had described didn’t really sound like Gall Bladder to him. He said he will have a look at it while he is operating and will remove it only if it looks infected or there is fluid around it etc. If not, he will leave it there, remove the band and then we will see if just removing the band helps with the problem – which he really thinks could solve the problem. If not my gall bladder can be removed later. I didn’t want to have a part of my body removed if it didn’t need to be! I came away feeling really happy about the whole situation – hungry – but happy. After a quick stop at one of our fave bookstores in Manuka we set off for home. Once home we both collapsed after another huge day!
Yesterday, Friday, I was completely worn out. I did have a short appointment I had to go to in the morning, but after that I spent a big portion of the day in bed. Emotionally, and even physically, I still can’t cope with so much going on – a lingering result of my emotional break down. I ventured out to my Sister’s in the evening. It was lovely to see my Niece at home and doing so well. To my surprise the actual sound of her voice has changed since her operation. This could partly be because things are still swollen inside her throat and nose etc, but I have a feeling that it will stay sounding different. Her speech is improving already now she can hear properly! It’s pretty incredible the difference in her already!
Today I am totally spent. I am still totally hungry, extremely tired and I think the combination of these two things is just making me want to cry. I am in day 6 of 16 days of this shake diet – I’m not even half way and I am just praying that hungry feeling will go away! I need something to happen to help me cope with it! The plus side of course is that I am losing more weight. I have now lost 12.6kg! That’s pretty exciting! I know there are lots of great things happening – but right now – right in the moment – all I can think about is how hungry I am! I had no idea how much food marked time in my day until it was taken away!
So anyway, that was my week – my massive week! I’m so glad it’s over. Now it’s just 11 days til the operation. Oh Lord help me make it through!